An Islamic Approach to Anger Management
The method of controlling one's anger is that the person should immediately remove the person upon whom his anger has descended from his sight. If he does not move away, the person who is angry should leave that place himself. He should then think and ponder that just as this person is at fault (or blameworthy), I am much more blameworthy in the sight of Allah. And just as I would like Allah to forgive me for my mistakes and sins, in the same way I should also forgive him for his mistakes. Thereafter the person should recite "A'udhu billah" several times, drink water or make wudu. In this way his anger will subside.
Arabic: أَعُوذُ بِاللَّهِ مِنَ الشَّيْطَانِ الرَّجِيمِ
Transliteration: A'udhu Billahi Min ash-Shaytan ir-Rajim
Translation: I seek refuge in Allah from the accursed Shaytan (Satan).
Once he comes back to his senses and still feels that the person deserves to be punished for his mistake or fault, he should first try and establish the method of punishment by ascertaining how a person is punished for such a mistake. Once he has established the method and is satisfied that it is according to the Shariah, he should mete it out.
Example, if the punishment being meted out is for the benefit and welfare of the person at fault as in the case of punishing one’s children in order to mend their wrong ways, or if by meting out punishment, there is benefit for a third person as in the case of punishing the oppressor to help the oppressed.
If a person curbs his anger in this way, he will be able to bring it under his control within a few days. He will no longer be hot-tempered.
Malice and hatred is also born from anger. Once a person has complete control over his anger, malice and hatred will also disappear from his heart.
